Why?

Why do I feel so frustrated and sad this night?
Why even then had laught so and even had felt so good, this night?
Maybe I don´t hear a "NO" for answer "a maybe yes" but only friends, a "don´t cacht my hand here because the people see us", a kiss here no, a  "you can´t sleep in my home" when I wished it, cannot to do sex, when I wanted, because at you don´t crave it, I don´t want to feel like a nun, I want to cry, to claim, to feel like a woman I am. I´m very sad and only this night. Told to me if I haven´t reasons to cry, now I remembered the talk with your friends that heard  accidentaly and I embarrased. And I ignore it and called you. Today I notice me that you only are a brown cat, only someone similar to I wished and for a moment, only a week turned off the flame I felt for him for felt  for you but you aren´t anyone the half of better than him, not more remotly even that the half of I felt for him. Really I think that you embarrased of me, that don´t wanted me even  a little, that never wished me, I don´t call you more, I don´t send you noone message more. Definitely I think that I make a big error with you. Only I remembered a handful of songs, a pleasant site and someone whom I will not see more, I don't like wasting my time.
PD :Odio el puré de patatas. Cualquier puré.